I took a sabbatical, a breather, a pause. We must do that you know. Just step back and evaluate the current, the immediate and decide what takes priority. That is what life teaches us. We are thrown a ton of curve balls, obstacles, challenges. I always have said. It is how we handle them, deal with them, and God willing, triumph and most importantly, learn from them. I have also learned along the way. Life does not “stop”, it doesn’t really wait. You are either in it or avoiding it. The hardest lesson by far. Letting it go and relinquishing the thoughts that you have control. As a mother, this is very difficult to accept and to not want to fix, or make it better. I am learning. My children are grown and yet they need me in a very different way now. I pray I can be the mother they need, when they need me. There is nothing more important to me.
When 2016 rolled around, I thought, I prayed, things would be easier, simpler, our family would continue to heal and we would take a positive step forward. Life just doesn’t work that way. So, I dig in hard, scrape my knees and crawl through the mud and pray. I do it everyday. I meditate and ask for guidance and inner peace. Spring gives me instant renewal and hope. The ice and snow melt. The daffodils and tulips symbolize new growth, new hope.
My nephew Thomas married last week in Texas. We flew down to join and celebrate his marriage. I could see and feel the love between them. I am grateful he found a loving soul, who deeply cares for him. That does my heart good. The only thing missing was his father, my brother. I felt his loss all week long. I am sure he did too. Again, life does not wait, it just keeps giving. Knowing he has a partner, a lover, a friend, a wife, fills my heart with Joy. Love is a beautiful thing. I think he was happy we all attended. We toured Austin and had some good eats, Taco’s! & BBQ, the weather was awesome and so was Austin. The only thing missing was you Tom…always missing you.
love & hugggs