I’ve been avoiding this….
Hello from Sunny Long Island, I sit in complete silence and serenity anxious that I must address and confront the horrific act of terror at the Boston Marathon 4/15/13. I am sure it began like any other ordinary day. Sunny day, thousands gather to watch. A tradition in Boston, and in many other places, marathons. I’ve always admired the spirit and heart of a “runner”. How do they keep going? What drives an athlete to train? How do they do that distance? I have always been in awe of people that commit to training, perfecting, challenging oneself to do better. I applaud and admire you from afar. I am not a runner. I don’t go long distances on foot, unless its a shopping marathon (smirks). I do those pretty well, I might add. But, as you can see I use humor to deflect what my heart and soul are screaming for me to pen. I avoid admitting that this country has failed us all again. Americans, we tend to be gullible when it comes to issues of security and safety. We took for granted as kids riding our bikes after dark, leaving your doors and cars unlocked. We trusted neighbors with our homes and children. We were footloose and fancy free and more at peace with humanity. I come here to admit my land, my America has forever changed. Surely, we all run and blame the psychopaths that roam our world. We analyze the meaning of each tragedy. Was it an act of Terrorism, it is directly linked to Al Queda? Is it another devastating story of a young adult gone gun crazed insane? Video gaming? Social Media? Religious callings and beliefs. Honestly, its a mixture of all of the above. We as a nation don’t know who to trust or accuse or believe in. It’s a breakdown of society, a crack in the foundation of our core beliefs, a disinegration of humanity and reason. I will agree that the FBI had knowledge, interviewed this terrorist and his brother. I can’t fathom why they failed! You don’t fail at that level, or at least I believed in their ability and committment, not to fail. I heard about the bombings when I was leaving work Friday evening. I played out different scenarios in my mind. Is it a “messed up kid” again? Is it like SandyHook, some recluse that builds an empire of weapons in his room? The obvious haunting question all Americans live with, is it an act of terrorism against our country? The bottom line is, its all of it. It’s a radical pair of misled young “militants” disciples of Al Queda, breeding and blasting messages of hate and wishes of death and devastation. The truth is, it doesn’t matter how it evolved. What matters is, deep inside, we all fear this will never end. We will forever live in a Nation that has been broken and cracked and ripped to shreds. The media poses theories, it unravels on LIVE TV, and we watch in utter horror and disbelief. We send prayers and thoughts and donations and sign petitions. Deep inside we know this will not end. Not for my children or future grandchildren. Our America today, is not the America I grew up in. Honestly, I had never really heard of Chechen, Russia. As an American, I feel clueless. We focus on Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan. Sadly, terrorists, terrorism appear to be everywhere. Scary and haunting, but it is the truth. I did watch some news updates and footage. I prayed. I avoided most of the gory details until….I turned on my laptop and they had a close up pic of someone with no leg. I could not believe what I was staring at. I will not forget that picture, it haunts me everyday. The events that unfolded within a few days, brought a tiny bit of relief to us all. One week to the day, the police and FBI captured them both. Amen for that. Spare me the debate on who to blame, what went wrong and why. Our nation, our people, our core has been abused again. I hear people comment often things like; This seems to be happening often, every month there is another tragedy, I live in fear now, America is slowly crumbling, etc etc. We blame the president, the Federal government, we blame lenient gun laws and religious factions and we blame and we blame. People die, children have been murdered, a movie theatre massacre. Hate and mentally unstable human beings dwell amongst us all. No corner or territory is safe. It’s slicing away the core of our values and morals, our trust, our God. Perhaps, for a moment “they” win. Isn’t terrorism built upon that? Control, fear, power, brainwashing. I for one will never give up on humanity. I will never not grieve or stop praying for justice and peace. I will never bow down or concede that they are ever victorious. Lastly, I will never surrender my core beliefs, my morals or values or my traditions. I will look upon all those sick souls as the devil and his work. I rise above it with my belief in human kindness and love to heal our people. I will continue to strive and be a better friend or neighbor. Like my father once told me. Don’t let anyone take away your dignity or self respect, stand up for what you believe in. He must have ALOT to say in heaven about this terrorist act, he was truly a patriot. Each day, I read something inspirational, lots of quotes, proverbs, and stories. Today, I read about the families that are coping and grieving the loss of their child in Newtown, Conn. Devastating, heart wrenching stories of trying to survive and live another day on earth without their child. I look to the sky and I rejoice in my blessings and in Jesus who watches over me & my family. I realize how delicate and precious each moment we live and love is. Most of all, I realize how fleeting and short our beautiful life and world can be. My sincere sorrowful prayers are with all the victims & families…Boston…Texas may God be with you always. ~ leelee